Unlikely Culprit

This morning as I was pumping gas (nearly $3 per gallon!!!) I could hear a clear bass line thumping out of an 80's vintage Blazer parked up by the quickie mart.  I was bobbing my head and shaking my hips just a smidge as I tried to place the beat.  To have me dancing before 10 a.m. was quite an accomplishment.  I wondered which tattooed young man would come out of the store and get into the hoopty that was heavy on the woofers, light on the turtle wax.

I watched as the exit door swung open and a gal in her late 30's wearing an old t-shirt, scruffy shorts, and a scowl marched out of the store and toward the Blazer, smokes in hand.

As she opened the driver's side door, the sound flowed out, much louder and clearer than before: "Oh, me so horny, me love you long time..."

Huh.

Three things ruining my day

1. The underwire bra I am wearing. For the love of technology, can't we come up with some other, more comfortable way to lift and separate? Or lift and squish together? Or whatever we're trying to do to them these days? This is torture.

2. The waist on these pants is too small. (alternatively known as: 2. The waist on my body is too big.) Just the waist, mind you. The rest of the pants fit just fine. So in addition to the wires gouging my rib cage, the waistband of these pants is slicing me in two.

3. Backfat. (aka: My bra is too tight, or my shirt is too snug, or both?)

I'm feeling some definite body depression today. The weight is coming off, but slowly, and I'm edgy with a strange combination of PMS and Spring Fever.